I find positive self-talk to be one of the hardest aspects of helping people change their lives. We all have a story that we tell ourselves on a daily basis and oftentimes that story is that we are not good enough, we are not strong enough, we are not smart enough, and the list goes on and on. Where did we get these beliefs from, and who sold us on this story?
A good example of self-talk which I came across recently was from a lady I was chatting with.
She is a manager at a baby clothing store, and she was telling me about how she wanted to start her own business. She told me that she makes beautiful cakes and would like to start her own cake business. I said to her, “Why don’t you just start?” She jumped around the question for a while, but in the end she admitted she was afraid that it wouldn’t work. She was scared of running out of money.
Fear of failure is one of the main reasons people don’t go after their dreams. They stay in dead-end jobs which seem comfortable and at night, resting on the couch, they have these great ideas in their minds, but that’s all they are, ideas. Ideas that never amount to anything.
They say that the best place to find ideas is at the cemetery. That’s where ideas go to die.
People think “What if?” What if I start my own business and it fails? What if my family doesn’t support me? What if I fail and everyone thinks I’m a joke? What if I lose all my friends? What if I go bankrupt? What if, what if?
They hang on to the “What ifs?” all their lives, but when their day comes and they are lowered into the ground, all their dreams and great ideas go with them.
I am going to tell you how risky life is. I warn you now, you won’t get out alive!
So why not take chances, why not risk it all? We could be very safe and just stay inside. People could bring us food and help us with all our daily needs, and we would probably live to a very old age. But what kind of life is that? Just taking in air every day, and not much else.
I challenge you to fight your fear of failure and go for it. Write down your goals and work towards achieving them.
If you fail, that’s OK. You can pick yourself up again. Les Brown has a great saying that if you fall down, make sure you land face-up because if you can look up, you can get up. Jump back on that horse and get galloping.
Think of the worst things that could happen. I tell you, you won’t die from a failed business, you won’t die from five failed businesses, and if you go bankrupt, which is highly unlikely, guess what, you’re still alive and can still have a good life and at least there will be a few less dreams buried at the cemetery.
Here are a few suggestions for you.
1st Find close friends who will build you up and encourage you, and tell them about your desire to start your own business.
2nd Research everything you can about the business you want to start. Find people who have done what you want to do and mirror them.
3rd If fear takes hold of you and you don’t think you can completely jump into your business, start it on the side. With the lady I spoke about earlier, seeing that she was afraid to quit her job and go straight into the cake business, I told her to just start with one cake. She can bake in her spare time. Sell one cake for a profit and then bake two cakes. Sell those and then bake three more, and so on.
4th Knowledge is power, so I would suggest reading all the books you can about your business. Also, read books about how to start a business. You will need to know a little about sales, accounts, marketing etc., but you don’t need to know everything to start with. Mainly, you should just start.
5th Write down on a piece of paper exactly what your end goal is and, every day, read aloud what you’ve written and think about it throughout the day. That way you will develop a burning desire for the achievement of your goal.
6th You must change. If you want things in your life to get better, then you need to get better. There is no use starting a business venture if you are depressed most days. You will need to get some areas in your life fixed first. Whether it is improving your relationships with others or working on your own personal problems, I strongly recommend self-improvement. If you can get out of bed excited about the day ahead, imagine the fire you’ll be able to put into establishing a new business.
7th Break it down. If you become overwhelmed by thoughts about all the work that needs to be done to establish and run your business, then break it down. Just take the first step. You could start by simply applying for an ABN number and a business name and that will lead to another step, and then another step.
I say to people, if you want to write a book, break it down. Just write one page a day and in eight months you will have finished your book. Don’t think about more than one page today. If you do that, the task won’t seem overwhelming.
These are some steps to start applying, I haven’t put them in order, because everybody will be at a different stage.
As an entrepreneur, I ask you now – no, actually I beg you – please don’t let your dreams go to the grave with you! Please don’t let them head in that direction. Take hold of your dreams and live life to the fullest. Make all your dreams and goals come true. Don’t just sit in the corner. Take hold of your life, come what may!